The Bane of my memories
by phoenixblitz
Summary: The man and the monster struggled, fought with each other, the heart versus the mask. Sometimes he would look in the mirror, would see flashes of the man, of who he used to be, with her. Then one half would win, and the man or the mask would draw him into a whirlpool of inescapable memories. A Bane/ Talia fic, series of one shots. Glimpses into Bane and Talia's turbulent history.
1. The mask and the man

"What did you see, what did you hear? For all your gravitas, you certainly can be a dumb animal. She's left you, it was never part of your 'master plan' together, she played you, the little innocent girl, the one with the pleading eyes, the fragile soul, she's GONE, she's left you, and now she's with them, with him, in HIS arms, what, do you think she's still as loyal to you as you've been to her. WAKE UP, Bane, the next time you see her, look into her eyes, look deep, and you tell me who you see. Talia al Ghul, or Miranda Tate, loyal to the Batman to the bitter end?"

* * *

He left, the mercenary he'd appointed to head up his control of Gotham. He had seen Talia's interactions with Bruce Wayne, seen but he did not understand. How could he, a pawn? How could he be made familiar with those memories, those motives. No, he did not understand anything he saw in her. She played her part far better than he had given her credit for. She held the knife, and he who knew her so well could see as she entered that chamber, that glint, just for a split second, a miniscule slip of the mask… and there it was. The fire, the fury, the pure torturous intent behind her damsel-in-distress mask. The loathing, the flame was there, and oh, how it burned. How she longed to raise her father's killer to hell, and his precious, filth ridden Gotham along with it.

* * *

Bane couldn't help but smirk behind the mask as Talia continued the façade of the quaking, resentful accessory to mass murder. A pretty accessory to be sure, but look deeper into those flashes where only her protector, her best friend, her whole world could see, and then would you catch sight of the orchestrator of this whole operation. And now the clock was ticking, what pretty music to conduct, sweet symphonies to Talia's ears. The doomsday clock in her iron grip.

* * *

He couldn't stand it. He'd seen what Talia's father had taught her, amongst interrogation techniques of bodily torture and blackmail, her father had taught her the method that sometimes stabs deepest. Straight through the heart if done correctly, and Talia was an expert. To win a mans heart, to seduce him, lure him into her arms, into her bed where all secrets were laid bare, she had no equal. Bane had seen this in the days they trained together, when they had escaped the pit. She had grown steely, fiery, sharp and beautiful beyond any common rivalry. Still, while Bane knew Bruce Wayne, eccentric billionaire and cripple was moist clay in Talia's hands, ready to be shaped and moulded to do exactly what she wanted, he shuddered at the thought of her in his arms. All the years they had spent together had built up a wall of protection around his increasing soft spot for Talia, and protecting her was his first and foremost responsibility and occupation. In the pit, perhaps, but you know what they say about old habits, and these ones had no intention of dying anytime soon.

* * *

The man in the mask fought with himself, the protector and the monster, both fighting with equal vigour, both losing to each other.

* * *

The protector shouted down the monster, the heart versus the mask. Sometimes he forgot who he used to be, and without Talia, without his… his everything, his angel, his one true reason for living… the mask, it took over, and now when he looked in the mirror, when the dark night was penetrated by thousands of pinpricks of light, his own form would be reflected back at him, and the mask and the anger were all he could see behind that hulking monster. Until his thoughts wandered to Talia, and sometimes he would see his old self flicker in the glass against Gotham's downfall, fierce eyes full of not anger, but loyalty, protection. Short hair cropped and brown framing a young face. And her by his side. And the memories would begin…

**Well, I wanted to create a fic that showed Talia and Bane's relationship in the league of shadows, how Bane protected her in the pit, and it was more of an older brother/ younger sister relationship, to escaping to Ra's al Ghul and becoming more like best friends, until Talia turns into a young woman. Remember, in this fic the age difference is not that vast, and Bane was only around nine or ten when Talia was born. So what i'm saying is that this leaves room for a possible… romantic relationship? Depends, I've done two other fics where they are strictly friends but… I feel like a change of pace.**

**Don't forget to REVIEW please.**


	2. Memories of a fallen angel

It was Bane, the man with a soul who had witnessed these events. Tonight he was not dragged through the mire of his despair, for once it was a memory to be cherished. But Bane knew better than to celebrate, for now that the man had been given his fill of control, he would not put up a strong enough fight against the monster, the mask that had been placed over his face, and with it a new soul.

* * *

The memory began. Bane was no longer in Gotham. He allowed himself to relax and take in the scene. Looking down, he saw that his arms were less bulky, his heart less heavy. The emotions swirling within him rang clear to him in the present day.

He was in the pit. Talia was with him, his body of sunlight. She always shone for him, and him alone, her face lighting up as he told her tales of the people who walked without confines or restraint, the ones who always basked in the sunlight with full stomachs and peaceful hearts.

Her eyes glistened as she turned to Bane and huddled closer to the warmth of his body.

"I'll do it one day Bane. We both will. We'll climb out and live without hunger, no fear of bad men or cruel walls, Bane. We can grow wings, jump and then fly to our freedom."

Bane smiled sadly. He didn't have it in him to give her the painful truth that would wipe that glorious beam off her face. Not when it filled him with such happiness. Happiness at seeing her happy. She was everything he had, and on days when their stomachs were full and the inmates still slumbered, he would look down at her, a small angel of hope sent to him, giving him a second chance, redemption, he could feel that in his heart she was all he could ever want.

* * *

Night after night, since the day he had saved her as a young child, he had kept her close. She had given him purpose, a beautiful purpose. Protect this young flame in the dark, and keep her burning so that one day they may all see the light. They may all see that her innocence was their redemption, too. He would always wait until she was asleep to check for intruders. Any number of men… heck, all the men probably wanted Talia for themselves for any number of sick motives, anything as simple as wanting an extra scrap of bread to something as twisted as… no, he didn't want to think about it. To his surprise he couldn't. The very thought of anyone doing that to his Talia, even thinking about hurting her, he would kill them on the spot, he would throw them from the highest level he could reach and he would not be satisfied until he saw their eyes glaze over, in his mind document the horror in their expressions to allow him satisfaction that they died in fear, the same way they would have made her die, cold, scared and alone. She would never be alone, he would never, _ever _allow it. As long as he breathed, as long as he could feel one speck of life running through his body, he would never allow harm to come to her. He would protect her, body and soul, and he will ensure she escapes this hell!

The man, this man, he is before the time of endless pain, the time where all hope was lost for him, yet only newly discovered. His only purpose in life, and the only creature he had ever dared to love had left. He had made her leave, wanted her to leave. He had forced her onto the wall to climb! She had to climb, climb to her freedom. Bane could see with every passing day as she started to bleed that she was changing. She was no longer fooling the new prisoners with her boyish disguise and those that did not know of Bane saw soon enough. It was the last thing they ever saw. Though Bane would never admit it, even fully to himself, he could no longer protect her. They came in surges and in crowds, waves of bodies trying to swallow them whole to get to her. He would not allow it, but the only way for her to be safe was for her to climb. Yes, it pained him, more than he dared show her, but he had to do it. He feared for her, her safety. No man had ever made the climb! But perhaps this was why she would succeed. She had nothing holding her back and everything there to push her on.

* * *

When men would fall, Talia's head would snap up at first each time it happened when Bane was with her instead of her mother. She was still wary of him in those early days. She would ask him, "What is happening?"

He would simply reply, "They climb towards the light."

"Do any of them make it?" she would ask, timidly.

She would turn to him and stare up at him with those big, blue eyes, like the sky that stretched up above. Bane knew, oh he knew that only the weak and the naïve held onto illusions such as these, but when he looked into her eyes, he could have sworn he saw the skies and the oceans, those blue eyes like the waters of an oasis. Though it was the fools role to dream, he did it because he had to, there was no other choice for either of them. He lifted her into his arms and crushed her to his chest.

"None so far, but I shall tell you why, Talia."

He tilted her chin up so that she looked him in the eye.

"It is because none of them have the purity or the resolve that you have, and I know you shall leave here and go on to live a better life. You will make the jump. You will make it and you will live."

Now she had to make it. The tide of bodies engulfed him just as Talia had climbed out of their reach. In their rage they all tore at Bane, crushing his bones, pummelling every square inch of him they could reach, breaking him a thousand times over. The object of their obsessions, gone.

The man looks up and he sees the final sight he will ever properly lay eyes on in this pit. Talia, her face twisted in agony, looking down at him. His pain was her pain. He knew this was the end. She would make it. He had saved her, and he was now at peace with himself at last. Taking one last breath, his eyes locked with hers.

"Goodbye…"

It was all but a whisper, still she heard it. She knew what he wanted her to do, and so she jumped. She jumped and lived.

* * *

The man snaps back to reality, to his burning city. There she stands behind him, silent as a whisper. Were he any other man he would have remained oblivious to her presence, but he had known her and she him for far too long for either of them to be under the illusion that they had fooled the other for a second.

The man and the monster struggle to greet her. The man wants to gather her close like he used to, whisper that everything would be alright, and he would yearn for them to sit side by side, arms around each other, him protecting her like always, she, his embodiment of hope, of life, of everything, what they were to each other, wrapped in a cocoon of memories till the sun broke across the ebbing horizon.

It is the mask, however, that wins out. The soldier, the cold hearted killer who discarded the tales of scars and touches long past, who focused only on the future, on the act.

So he walks forward and informs her that progress is ongoing, the campaign successful, and she simply nods at him and smiles… sadly?

* * *

Talia Al Ghul does not acknowledge a weakness like sadness, does not succumb to such human longings like contact or whispered words of comfort. The mask is fully in control again, but behind the mask the man stirs and sees the memories the masked man is now going through. Inside he tries to scream, but he is too weak. The strategist within him plans and calculates, thinking of Talia now as a partner and an accomplice only. The mask, only a device designed to keep him alive had slowly made people shun him, turn from him in fear and as his body continued to build in muscle and strength, few remembered him for who he really was. Now Bane struggles to see the man at all in the mirror, the man he was. Those eyes stare back at him, and they scream at him the torture that he still endures inside. The mask took away one form of pain… and brought with it another.

A new memory, and he finds himself drawn into the league of shadows, looking at her, her trembling form. Oh no… it's… he's too late. He's failed. And now this memory he had kept locked away for so many years, one they had both locked away… it had resurfaced to taunt him once again…

***Gasp* what happened that was so terrible? What did Bane fail to do? Or… what did he do? Next chapter will be darker. In following chapters, find out just what exactly happened to leech Bane's humanity from him, is there still a chance for him, what is the hidden past between him and Talia and who really broke Bane? **

**Don't forget, REVIEW! **


	3. Green Eyed Monster: Part One

Green eyed monster

The man in the mask writhed on the ground. No one hears the silent screams of the damned, nor the cries of the walking wounded, so quiet but so tortured. No one hears him, alone as he is sucked into his agony, into his shame. If only he could undo it, if only he could just take it back. Talia, please…

* * *

"We found him, Talia."

"I know. I know, it's just been so long... he's... he's so _broken. _Father, please, you have to help him."

"I don't know if I can, child. He is suffering, he is in so much pain. It would be kinder to put him out of his agony. Even if we were able to get him mobile and functioning again, he would be forever disfigured beyond repair. He would have to live an existence of torture."

"Father, please! You have to find some way to help him!"

"I will search for one month to find a way to save him, Talia. Beyond that I promise nothing."

* * *

"Bane?"

A strangled gasp broke the silence. Light blinded him, setting his eyes ablaze with pain. There was something new, though. Once his eyes adjusted, once his heartbeat steadied, he was able to take his tangled web of thoughts and pull from the mass the most important one, the most pressing matter. Talia. Where was Talia? Please, let her be safe. Let her be free, let her be happy, let her be alive, let her come home. Please, let her come back to me. My angel, where is she?

Memories flashed in his mind, and the horror came back to him, the pain. Six years of agony, of torture. It took some time before Bane realised what was different. The pain... where was the pain? Where was his unhappy companinion who needled and broke him, who set him alight and crushed him every day of his existence? Why was it gone?

Then he saw her, and at once, the obvious answer came to him. There, by his side. There she was. The bright star in his dark, dark sky, setting the darkness ablaze with light, keeping him going, giving him hope. So bright but so far. Now she was here by his side, the pain was gone. Had he passed on? Had the pain took him, was he with her at last? Paradise. Was this a new life?

"Bane?"

Bane reached slowly, his arm shaking for fear this was a dream, a cruel trick of the night. She grasped his hand, her face lighting up, his angel, come home to him. Something else wasn't right, though. The pain was gone, replaced by a strange numbness. The fog was slowly clearing, retreating from his mind, leaving a new, sharp clarity. A sight now un blurred by the pain, he was free to see the world through fresh, clear eyes. Eyes now drawn in growing horror to the gilded mirror behind Talia. Past the reflection of the great fire in its stone hearth, past the reflection of Talia's elegant back. That's when it hit him. The horror. Look. Look what has become of the demon of the pit. Look at what hell spat back out into the world. Look at the man, once proud, strong and handsome. Look at him now. Look at the broken, mangled shell of a man now disfigured, all but his face. For his face was now metal and rubber, a mask, one huge contraption that left nothing of himself visible, save for the eyes. The tortured, green eyes that now stared back at him as they screamed in horror, and so Bane opened his mouth, and he screamed with them.

"Bane!"

* * *

"Talia?"

His voice was strange to him. It was distorted and garbled, almost like speaking through his hand. Almost, but not quite. It was too robotic, too machine. There was no response, and so Bane propped himself up and negotiated his body onto the edge of the bed. The mirror caught a stray beam of sunlight, drawing Bane's eye. Dare he look and meet the man he had become?

* * *

In Gotham, riots had broken out in the streets. Bane broke through the surface of his consciousness, gasping for breath, each breath pulled through the mask. He turned to the mirror, suddenly finding himself afraid. The man stirred, tentative and unsure.

_What have I become?_

* * *

_What have I become?_

He had to look. It had to be a dream, a nightmare. His demons danced before his eyes for the briefest of moments, and then they were gone, back into his soul where they lay, fires lying dormant, Bane knowing only too well how easily they could be sparked again. No turning back now. He lifted his head, and he met himself in the mirror.

There were no screams this time, no cries of anguish. There were only the silent tears that streamed down his face as he watched his world shatter with the mirror as its fragments rained down onto the floor with his heart. A candle stick lay with the shards, dented at the base from the force with which it has been flung into the frame. This was all that was left of the man. Tortured eyes and a broken heart. The rest was a destroyed wreck, and there, a mask. The man was no more. This was who he was now. He had been forgiving, he had tried to bring redemption to hell. Look where it had gotten him. No more. He had tried to live his life as a man with something to live for, a man with purpose in the pit. Talia had kindled the fire in his heart for hope, and so he tended it diligently whilst he was still young and foolish enough to cling on to such a thing as hope. No more. Now he had a new life, and he would never allow himself to be open to weakness again. He would build himself up, he would become strong, he would become what a man could only dream of. Bane was determined to rise.

He would rise, he would become strong again, he would never be broken again, but this was not for himself. He had died a thousand deaths, and he would do it again for her. He would live through the fire and the storms just to see her safe. To see her happy, to see her smile... he would do anything and everything to defend her. They had been through hell together, and so long as he had a breath in his broken body, he would never let her go. Could she love a monster, though? A monster was all that Bane saw now. The monster in the mask. That was all that was left. That was all that Bane could see.

* * *

Time passed. Talia and Bane trained together in the league of shadows, but while Talia flourished in skill and friendship, Bane, although unmatched in all but Ra's al ghul himself, remained an outcast to all but Talia. Her love remained, and continued to grow for her gentle protector, but the doubts began to grow in her mind. Was he still there? But Bane would never leave Talia, no matter what. The heart of a man, however, when twined with an iron fist, was a deadly and destructive combination that Bane could not control. The broken heart of an outcast; the iron fist of a man breaking the boundaries of what it was to be human...

* * *

From infant and boy, to child and youth. Protector and angel, to companions in life. Bane's quiet observation of Talia shifted slowly, stealthily. His eyes began to draw new details from his angel. From a child, a symbol of hope and redemption, had sprung a young woman, strong, slender, elegant and beautiful. He began to notice the way her dark curls fell over her eyes and tumbled down her back. He began to notice her graceful walk, her gently curved figure silhouetted by the setting sun. He began to notice how her smooth skin caught the moonlight as she fought him on the mountain tops, and he began to notice her lips, full and lush, mesmerising him as from them poured words of love and joy. But what Bane noticed the most were her eyes. He had always looked into her beautiful eyes and he had seen hope, joy, purity, the stars themselves in those eyes when he had protected her, his angel. Now he saw something new in the stars. He saw himself and Talia in the future, them against the world, facing it all... together, forever. Bane just had yet to realise these feelings, but they were bubbling below the surface, burning and growing, each day feeding the fire in his heart and soul.

All it took was a flare to break the surface.

* * *

Anyway, so Bane is developing romantic feelings for Talia. Chances are that this won't be an M rated piece, but there will be romance and betrayal. Next, Green eyed monster Part 2. Sorry this took so long to post. Title for next memory, "Dance with the Devil." I'll let you draw your own conclusions for now.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed it, and, as always, please, _please_ **REVIEW****!**

Formula: R+S=FF

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